Friday, September 23, 2011

I was thinking...

...about when I wrote these words: "I am a published writer, but in my estimation, not nearly enough as I should be". Well, today they seem arrogant. It is not that I think I'm such a wonderful gift to humanity that I deserve it all. NO! I am self-conscious about my work, myself. In truth, what I was trying to say to myself is "Get off your duff, Christina, and WRITE MORE!" I was thinking about missed opportunities. I was trying to motivate myself to become more, because I am not where I am supposed to be yet. Seems I need a mantra.

There is this innate feeling, calmly guiding me. I've always felt like Life is pulling me slowly in a certain direction. I think I will instinctively know when I have reached the point. I am not there yet. I must keep going, keep it together, keep WRITING.

I used to think everyone felt pulled by a life's path electricity, but I get blank looks when I try to explain myself. It's a winding road; not yellow brick, but invisible. It's just life, no need to panic, people. But I've always believed in energy, mysticism, signs. How could I stop now?

If you feel this way, too, then I hope you get to your Someday soon.

Look, I just feel this pull to create. I will not use perfect punctuation, nor school you or myself in grammar. When I try the hardest, it comes out all wrong. Sometimes I glide, often I sink, but one day, I hope to rise above. I don't float. I panic. Snap your fingers. Pull that black turtleneck over your head. I'm not going to make any sense today.

I was invited to read at The Kelly Writers House this upcoming Monday. Do you know how many amazing writers have read their work at The Kelly Writers House? People like Joyce Carol Oates, for example! I am honored, happy and very excited to be included in this event. Here is the link, if you are curious: http://writing.upenn.edu/wh/calendar/0911.php
Since it is both a live show and a radio show, it will air the following Monday night on WXPN 88.5 FM at 8 pm.

So think happy thoughts for me & clap your hands loudly so I don't fade away ("Peter Pan" was always my favorite, fyi).